Tuesday, April 13, 2010
(hi honey, yeah I'm talkin' about you on my blog)
Amongst my other emotional afflictions, I also suffer occasional bouts of Spousal Exhaustion. When the mister and I travel together, we start out on a relationship high ("Wow, so nice to be spending all this time together! Let's make out! Let's play Scrabble! Let's talk!") that slowly unravels and, between days 5-7, culminates in a Relationship Meltdown.
He turns into such a Mr. Magoo when we travel, and I become hyper-alert/organized/motivated. I don't sleep, I want to do EVERYTHING, and I want to be there yesterday.
This is an especially bad combination where driving is involved. On our last trip to Portland, I wanted to hurl my body from the (very slowly) moving car. He does, however, drive very quickly when he's passing an open parking space that we have been looking for, and again, very slowly if we have tickets to a show that starts in one minute, reservations that we're late for, or I haven't eaten in 18 hours. The more urgent the situation, the more languorous he is. I actually decided to give birth at home because I couldn't stand the idea of being driven to the hospital by Sunday Driver.
That, and he has a nose whistle that makes me homicidal after 48 hours.
Other Mr. Magoo moves that cause me to swear, each and every trip, that it's our last:
Very post-9/11 he showed up at the airport WITHOUT A FORM OF I.D. to get through security.
Sure honey, it's the 1950s. They'll just take your word for it. Be sure to let the stewardess know how you want your steak cooked, too!
He got lost four minutes from the airport, we missed our flight, were stranded in a 3rd world country with our children, and had to pay $3000 (extra) to get home.
I guess I have some faults, too. He may even describe me as "anal" when we travel.
Anyone else have this problem? Or are you and your significant other the perfect travel companions? And if this is the case, why are you lying to yourself?