Possible Reasons I Haven't Been Blogging

1. Abducted by aliens that wanted to harvest my mojo.

2. Writing a screenplay about my blogging experience entitled "You Have Zero Comments".

3. Was drinking coffee and sitting in front of the computer all day, so thought I WAS blogging...

4. Shopping trip to Paris, and I bought you ALL gifts!

5. Partying with Charlie Sheen. Wore him out.

6. Yacht shopping in Portofino...didn't find anything I liked.

7. Got lost in the Bermuda Triangle...again.

8. Discovered abandoned warehouse full of Danish furniture. Died of heart failure.

9. Set World's Record for most laundry done in one day.

10.Cut myself on a piece of furniture while working...contracted a rare Danish teak-borne illness. CDC quarantined me in Denmark. Saw a lot of bicycles and cured meats.

DOS COLOR

I could look at the Dos Family home tours ALL DAY LONG.
I love the way they splice together complementary images. Exquisite.
The Swedes are surprisingly fearless decorators. Do images like this make you want to take more decorating risks?
Do you love color but shy away from using it?
Are your walls...BEIGE by default??

Cellos give me the almost-crieds

I went to the symphony, okay? I'm on a little bit of a roll with the cultural expeditions.

But seriously, I think I'm onto something here. When most of the women around you are using walkers you really start to feel like a lithe, spry young thing. And hey, when you've been twenty eight for several years like me, that feels good.

Other places to feel like a spring chicken:

The ladies locker room just prior to an "aqua aerobics" class at the public pool. This may also be where you begin to see the wisdom in not getting a tattoo.

Any Denny's or Coco's restaurant, any time, but especially at 4pm. Prime rib, coffee, and a $1 tip anyone?

A medical devices supply store ("Hey, sweet oxygen-tank-on-wheels set-up you got there!")

A stage performance of Shakespeare (not only will you feel young, you'll be the only one awake!)

In line for a flu shot. If you don't have stool softeners, Centrum Silver and laxatives in your cart, you will practically feel like a baby.

So there you go.
If you think you might want to get a little more artsy but you're not in the "major donor plaque on the wall" income bracket, do what I do. Register your email account with your local symphony, opera, theatre, etc., and when they have empty seats at a performance they will send super-discounted offers to you. They're usually at least half-price with a day or two notice. I took my whole family to see Spamalot with $7 tickets!

Do you do any artsy things in your city? Is the crowd as geriatric as it is here, or is it a better mix?

These are things

not made for trend or profit or notoriety or self-promotion. How often is that the case anymore?



Purely creation for the sake of it. And for the pleasure, maybe. The challenge? Yes, most likely that too.



Dalton Ghetti spends months, sometimes years, on each piece. And he refuses to sell a single one.



An extraordinarily evil thought struck me while reading this article. Say he has a wife. And say one morning without thinking she grabs a pencil to jot down her grocery list.

Later, he walks into the kitchen to find half a year's work lying broken atop a sticky note that reads milk, bread, eggs, pencils.










You can read more about him here.

Opera Lessons

Friday night some friends and I dropped a wad of cash to see the opera Turandot.

Here is a review of everything but the music.

1. David Hockney can design the poop out of a stage.

2. In San Diego "I'm going to the opera" is synonymous with "I'm going to Disneyland" and "I'm a Midwesterner going to the beach".

Apparently it's ok to wear a Hawaiian beach cover up with a Harry Potter sweater scarf and flipflops.

And if you're old and have bad taste, you're really in luck! You can wear orthopedic sandals with socks and shorts, so no, you are not the Greatest Generation that wore hats and ties and made everything all classy-seeming...you are a Schleppy McShlepper like Hawaiian Harry Potter lady and you should know better. Shame!

3. You can be the hottest (youngest, freshest-smelling, least wrinkled, lowest blood pressured, least likely to be part bionic) girl in the room, if you go to the opera.

4. You shouldn't panic if your friend shows up overdressed in a coat made of Chewbacca fur.

Sure, initially you will walk several feet away, and it will continuously startle your internal "bear alert" mechanism.

But later it will prove to be a good place to lay your head when the opera is still going at 10:45pm. You will dream that you are in Dr. Zhivago sleeping on a pile of Russian bear furs.

5. The real entertainment begins at 11pm, when 8,000 senior citizens are simultaneously released to wander the vast parking structure, like a mutant race of old people zombies, looking for their cars...with one policeman trying to assist them all. I hope they've all made their way home by now. I really do.

So, support The Arts. You can pay hundreds to watch an old guy play a young man singing about China in Italian. Through binoculars.

I'd totally do it again.

Mid Century Leather Safari Chairs and Monumental Danish Teak Cabinet/Dresser

Fresh cuts in the store now!
Don't even get me started on how this piece can save your marriage with its sexy storage:




or how much these want to hang out on a sheepskin flanking your fireplace...they do. Really bad.





Anyone being fantastic and glamorous this weekend?

I'm going to the opera and then for late night champagne cocktails and croque monsieur at a French restaurant downtown. No bigs.

Oh don't worry, no men were injured in the planning of this evening. Ladeez nite! Maybe I will meet a 100-year old philanthropist geezer that likes redheads. Fingers crossed! Dreams really do come true.

Make Your Own Industrial, Danish, or Antique Furniture

So, how often do you have a specific furniture design in mind that you can't find ANYWHERE? Or the pieces you DO fall in love with all seem to be in the four-digit range?

Maybe you spend hours on Craigslist or Ebay waiting for just the right piece to come up, and it never does.

Think about making your own. Not from scratch--this isn't the "This Old House" blog. But you can source the basic components of the furniture you want, and assemble the coolest custom pieces.

And believe me, if you can put together that IKEA Billy bookcase, then you can most certainly do this.

If you love industrial chic--things that look like they're from old factories, schoolhouses, and science labs, this is a great site for inspiration. And sticker shock.




Figure out what the basic components are and then source them at Home Depot and Ebay:

These huge, uber-industrial casters are only $30 for a set of four on Ebay!



Add them to some steel shelving, $53 at Home Depot or Amazon. BONUS: it can be assembled horizontally as a workbench. Attach metal casters for an industrial bar cart, desk, or moveable kitchen island.



Or to these pine IKEA shelves that most people use for garage storage (this would look a lot like the first picture, don't you think?)



Or search Ebay or Craigslist for old wooden crates and attach the casters for a rad rolling toy chest, laundry cart, or storage bench seat!



Like the organic-modern vibe? Shockingly cheap to make.

Search "wood slabs" or "burl slabs" on Ebay. Both these pieces were only around $35.



Search "hairpin legs" for the bases. Screw them in.

Depending on the size of your slabs and hairpin legs, you can make anything from a huge dining table, to a long bench, to a pair of little side tables (total projected cost around $70).



Or attach them to a generic dresser for a George Nelson look:



These are the tapered wooden legs I bought to make my son's "Danish" bed. I attached them to the bottom of a captain's bed and painted the whole unit black. Voila-Danish storage bed.

These come in tons of sizes and you can attach them to the bottom of an ottoman, stool, bench, wood slab, or remnant of marble or quartz from a local countertop place.



Search Ebay for old wooden tripod bases, and with around $8 in electrical parts you'll have the most amazing industrial/salvaged/antique floor lamp.



For $2250 less than this one on 1st Dibs!



Want to Anthropolgie-ize an armchair or ottoman, or construct something completely custom?



You just can't fake the patina of real antique legs. These were available (very cheaply, I might add) on Ebay under "wood furniture legs":



Add $8/yard linen from Premier Prints:



And here's some others I loved:






Are your creative juices flowing? What would you consider making?


SOURCES FORTHCOMING!