WINTER INTROSPECTIVE...an epic post about muffins, bizness, and being a lady

photo by Dave Beckerman

While there's a bit of a deep winter lull in sales, I've been turning my attention to other things. One is cooking dinners that involve more than three ingredients (two of which are usually from Trader Joe's, the third is wine...dang, also from Trader Joe's).

Some super nice friends of ours belong to a local organic CSA and their house is the pick up location, so when other members don't show up for their produce (or our friends lock their front gate and won't let them in) they can keep or distribute the leftovers to friends! Last week we were the lucky recipients of a huge box of lots of gangly green things that we've been faithfully plowing through as best we can. I've had spinach in my teeth ALL WEEK! And I kid you not, there was a head of lettuce in that box whose texture and flavor were transcendent, I tell you! Almost like steak, but better because it won't kill you. Seriously, it was so different from grocery store lettuce. Say what you want about organic but I'm a huge believer that the flavor and nutrient levels are superior to conventional vegetables. And I know I'm right.

Do you belong to a CSA? I would definitely consider doing it, or sharing a weekly box with a friend or neighbor if you think you can't use it all. Not only have we eaten WAY more greens and veggies this week than usual, but I feel like it's influenced our other food choices, too. You're just not going to follow a giant helping of kale with an In 'n Out hamburger! Unlesss you are, and then, at least using the spotty logic of my 14-year old, the kale cancels out the burger.

I've also been developing recipes for muffins. Not all technical and stuff, with test tubes and scales and calculators, but mostly by throwing flour all over the kitchen and putting everything healthy I can find plus some sugar into a muffin pan and baking it.

Our usual snacks are pretty healthy; edamame, hummus and pita, nuts, etc.. You know, the regular snacks of the privileged white minority. But these boys of mine are starving ALL THE FREAKING TIME and will mow through more processed stuff like cereal bars (gasp!) and Pirate Booty like no one's business. I know, because I find the bags and wrappers stuffed behind every cushion and pillow in our house! The act of sitting down over here is always accompanied by the sound of crinkling cellophane. I'm not a huge baker because I hate being tied to recipes, but muffins are quick and can survive my...experimentation.

I developed this recipe using ripe bananas to replace a lot of the fat and sugar, and stuffed them full of zucchini, whole wheat, and flax. They're ridiculously tasty, and I (almost never) find them stuffed behind cushions!

Whole Wheat Zucchini/Banana/Flax Muffins (plus chocolate chips if you're smart)

mix together:

3 cups grated zucchini
1/4 c. oil
2 very ripe, large bananas mashed well
3 eggs
1/2 c. white sugar
1/3 c. brown sugar packed
2 1/2 tsp vanilla

in separate bowl mix:

1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/2 C whole wheat flour
1 1/2 C white flour
1/4 C ground flax (or more!)

Add dry ingredients to wet, mix gently until just combined, throw in a handful of chocolate chips (we did...so good)

Put in greased muffins tins
Bake at 350 for 20-25 minutes until wooden pick comes out clean
Makes about 30 medium muffins with zero calories and .0002 megahertz of fat


And now the biz stuff:

Speaking of sales lulls, I've been thinking a lot about business lately. I always believed that my business would grow organically...that more and more sales would lead to hiring employees, opening a bricks-and-mortar location, and that I would eventually be running the business instead of doing most of the work. Although I can't really claim to have had a real plan, as I started this business completely by accident and have been trying to catch up with it ever since!

The economic implosion certainly didn't help the natural business progression I had hoped for. I feel incredibly thankful that I was able to simply keep my business running and profitable during the worst of the worst. While people around us were losing their homes and jobs, I was nervously paying off every bill and saving money in anticipation of the slowdowns that did indeed come for both my, and the hub's, business. Even though business dropped off steeply at certain points, we were totally o.k., and even spent the past few years traveling around the world with our kids (albeit super cheaply!) So I can't claim to be a total failure at this.


The economy is only half the story, and I am the other half. I've lately come to realize that I'm not as motivated as I'd like to be, the creative juices don't flow as fast, because design and furniture don't seem like important, meaningful work. Fun, yes. But let's be honest; I'm not changing any lives here.

On the other hand, my creative juices are a gosh darn Niagara Falls when it comes to helping people and fixing things. This is when I'm at my best and most motivated, which shouldn't be surprising...those aptitude and personality tests we all take in high school and college consistently said I should be a missionary or social worker! I really need to grapple with the fact that sometimes business can just be business (a living, a means to an end) and doesn't have to change the world, but my idealism says everything you do should matter!

Another part of this equation is that I still have a hankering for a professional life. I really intended to be an English professor/academic writer, and I fritter away a lot of my energy being "torn" about what I do instead of really investing myself fully into it. Sometimes I have an "I'll do it, but I'm not going to care about it because it's not brainy" attitude.

And finally, working from home tricks everyone, including me, into thinking I'm a stay-at-home mom. Sure I'll volunteer for your field trip, sure I'll give you a ride, yes I can babysit, bake muffins, do the laundry, and pick up the drycleaning! The joy of self-employment is making your own schedule! Right? Wrong!

Again, because I place little importance on business and money, I tend to prioritize everything else over it and end up not investing the time necessary to make it truly successful. I put everyone else's stuff first and allow that to dictate my schedule, instead of the other way around. Sure, the flexibility is a godsend sometimes when it's truly needed (sick child, family emergency, a well-earned personal day), but really, the structure of a fixed schedule helps keep everything in its place!

It's been interesting this week to see a mom working through issues that are very opposite to mine (a rigid work schedule, necessary business travel, missing out on kids' things, the pressure to have a remarkable career), and all the time I'm thinking, "I'd like to have those problems right now!"

It reminds me that we all have doubts about what we do, and there is no single way to get this family/money/meaningful work thing just right.

Yet I think it's in the nature of femininity to constantly question the path we're on, analyze how meaningful our work is, and fret about the impact of everything we do on our family. I don't think we will ever stop. Nor should we. This self-analysis is not driven simply by perfectionism, as I may have erroneously suggested to this mother. It's also driven by idealism, which is the less-neurotic sister of perfectionism. Women are born improvers, and while we can and should learn to enjoy things as they are, we will always see the ways in which they can improve. That's not a flaw.

Our husbands can usually do the status quo/contentment/living in the moment thing quite well, while we constantly have our eye on the bigger picture, the end goal. And I think we should give ourselves some credit for that. We see the possibilities and we move our families, our communities, our world, forward towards them. Yes, it drives everyone crazy sometimes, but ours is the idealism behind progress and change. It's the reason things get done and are made better.

So, ladies, I want to ask you this question: Heaven only knows you'll take all the blame, but when's the last time you took some of the credit?

Evolution of a diet

I don't know why this always happens. I'll notice I'm gaining a little weight. That evening, I throw a little going away party for cheese (intimate, just the two of us) by toasting a half-pound of it with two glasses of wine, because TOMORROW I'M NOT GOING TO EAT.

Not TOMORROW I'M GOING TO WALK THREE MILES, or TOMORROW I'M GOING TO EAT 1200 CALORIES. Just, I'M NOT GOING TO EAT.

This is dumb because usually I can drink coffee all morning and just plain FORGET to eat until 3pm, but after these romantic cheese parties and stalwart anti-eating declarations, I wake up DESPERATE TO EAT.

Last night, not only did I have a cheese party, I had a pear custard pie party, a homemade fried chicken party, and a roasted potato party. They partied late into the night in my stomach while I laid in bed and groaned. Clutching my stomach and making delusional resolutions.

This morning, I suspiciously watched half of a breakfast quesadilla go from crispy-flakey-oozey to greasy-heavy-rubbery, it's pointy end following my movements like a compass arrow. The quesadilla had locked on its target and would not let go until it had successfully launched straight onto my butt.

This is when I'M NOT GOING TO EAT turns into YOU HAVE TO EAT SOMETHING, WHY NOT THAT?

And it doesn't really count, because it doesn't even look good anymore and anyhow I didn't even make it for myself.

Essential diet tip of the delusional: OTHER PEOPLE'S FOOD HAS NO CALORIES.

So I heat it up, but really to get it crisp again the pan needs some butter. And really, this is just all fat and carbs and hadn't I better add half an avocado to it? You know, FOR NUTRITION?

This is when I realize what a small little piece it really was. Barely two bites! And I have to use up the other half of the avocado or isn't it going to go bad?

So I have to go now. The memory of crispy, buttery tortilla, creamy avocado and the slight tang of Tapatio sauce is fading from my tongue.

Tonight I will toast my cheese and try again. After all, "In order to succeed you must first be willing to fail," the saying goes.

I am willing. So very willing.

Don't just stand there-make something! Whole wheat cranberry scones with Greek yogurt

I know that at least 90% of you hipster ladies have all the ingredients for this on hand, and since it's a little chill and cloudy today I thought just maybe you'd like the smell of cinnamon and vanilla baking to fill the house. I swear, there is NOTHING like a pile of fresh-baked somethings, a cup of tea, and a Sunset magazine to make a lady feel new again (even if the Sunset magainze is from 1997 and you stole it from the dentist's office).



These are not the stiff, hard scones of yore but are rather more delicate and soft inside with a crunchy exterior (when still warm at least). I combined a few recipes and changed things around to come up with the perfect mix of health and taste.



I hope they cure what ails ya.



Take Two and Call Me in the Morning Healthy Yogurt Scones

DRY INGREDS:
1 cup dried cranberries
1 cup regular flour + 1 cup whole wheat flour
1 tbsp baking powder
1/2 tsp soda
1/4 c. sugar
1 tsp cinnamon


6 tbsp cold regular (salted) butter

WET INGREDS:
1 egg
3/4 c. Greek yogurt plain
1/4 c. milk
1 tsp vanilla

Heat oven to 400
Soak cranberries in hot water 10 minutes, drain
Whisk together dry ingredients
Cut in or rub in butter with fingers until crumb forms (pieces of butter should be no larger than pea size)
Mix in cranberries
Mix wet ingredients, add to dry ingredients and mix until JUST combined
Scoop 8 mounds onto lightly greased cookie sheet
Bake 20 minutes, or until golden and firm

GLAZE:
1 c. powdered sugar
1-2 tbsp orange juice (or lemon juice or milk)
1 tsp vanilla

Mix and drizzle over completely cooled scones.

{p.s.-according to kitchen law, the cook is entitled to all spilled glaze}

Killing Me Softly (with pesticides)

Oh human race, you are baffling. Somehow you have taken nature's perfect food and turned it into cancer-causing, neurotoxic death grenades.




The next time you see some study or headline or lame-o doctor proclaiming that "there is no evidence that organic is better", please feel free to revisit these facts:

Grapes have up to 14 different pesticides in a single sample

Peaches are treated with more pesticides than any other produce--with combinations of up to 57 different chemicals found in their flesh

Hot peppers are treated with as many as 97 pesticides, cucumbers 68, and greens (lettuce and dark greens like spinach, kale, mustard greens...you know, the really good stuff) up to 66.

You can read about the methodology of this annual study (as well as other fun and encouraging facts!) by clicking here.




The EWG comes up with a safe and unsafe list every year.

Here are their "dirty dozen" worst offenders:

apples
celery
strawberries
peaches
spinach
nectarines
grapes
red/yellow bell peppers
potatoes
blueberries
lettuce
kale/collard greens
[cilantro]*
[cucumbers]*
[raspberries]*

*also tested off the charts for pesticide contamination

And here are their "clean fifteen" with zero or very minimal contamination:

onions
sweet corn
pineapples
avocado
asparagus
sweet peas
mangos
eggplant
cantaloupe
kiwi
cabbage
watermelon
sweet potatoes
grapefruit
mushrooms

I don't know about you, but I'm shopping with this list from now on.

Things Good Mothers Do and other whack lies

Things good mothers do:

Bake homemade cookies with organic peanut butter, sneaking in bits of flax and whole wheat flour



Things good mothers who run businesses do:

See above, then realize you can't just stand in front of the oven all day and turn the last of the dough into one giant cookie. Pass it off as a deliberate novelty. "I thought you guys would like it!" They did.

A San Diego weekend....with teens

After a Saturday morning of volunteering and trying to avoid jail time by finally getting to my 2009 taxes, I was ready.

Ready to find out what everyone means when they say they can't wait for the weekend.

The radness of having older kids is that "doing family stuff" no longer involves petting zoos that you have to pretend to be all into, or brainless cartoon movies about smart babies and dumb parents. Yay!

What does it involve? A visit to Pablo at Soul Grind to talk about "downhill decks" and "flexing trucks" (if you're new to skate lingo, this is a mother's worst nightmare...it's Tokyo Drift on a skateboard).

This visit should be followed up by a tour of the Children's Hospital "He Wasn't Wearing a Helmet and Now He Has No Face" Unit.

Here's Pablo. If you feel the urge to spill your brains or lose half your skin surface on San Diego pavement, he's your man. The nicest guy ever, and the hero of the Groms.



What next? A lady-like salad for mom? Nope. Epic burritos featured on Man v. Food, from Lucha Libre.



Shrimp, carne asada, avocado, french fries, chipotle sauce. You can call ahead to reserve the gold "winner's" booth! Don't be fooled by the picture-it was jam-packed and you had to pull some Lucha moves to get to the salsa table.



Hat shopping. "You look stupid in that hat." "I'm going to pull down your pants and spank you right here if you talk like that again."

They even gave me 15 minutes in Anthropologie. "Mommmmmmm, are you done yet are you done yet are you done yet?"

Sunday morning an angel brought me the Los Angeles Times and bottomless coffee in bed. And banned children and dogs from the room.

Then everyone got new shoes.

And we took them to the wet beach to break them in.






We checked out some of Dad's super-secret surf spots, which all seem to be named Dead Man's something or other. Why is that?











And in between, I accidentally-on-purpose (I wasn't supposed to be working but it's not work if I'm having fun!)stumbled across some major cool finds...TBA!






Lucha interior by San Diego Daily Photo

San Diego, dat you? A field trip to Craft & Commerce

The buzz about this restaurant had me feeling so not cool enough to go.



On our precious date nights, we don't want a scene and we certainly don't need attitude or pretention. But the menu was deliciously similar to Freemans Restaurant in NYC, and they have cornmeal fried pickles for gosh sakes (a favorite at this local spot, but you have to pick through the other veg to find the pickles)!



The are-we-cool-enough factor was compounded when we pulled up and a private stretch limo was at the door. Then I was like, are we mogul enough?

Decked out in my mostly-thrifted outfit (rockin the boots!) I faltered for a second, then smacked my self-esteem upside the head (I have to do this a lot) and decided that nothing is out of my league. I make my own league and my league wants pickles!

A cute boy in pork-pie hat and suspenders greeted us (sweetly...oh darling shy hipster boys!)

I think the interior is meant to be "rustic/industrial speakeasy". There are tiny Old West oil lamps(the kind you would use to go out to the barn and check on the horses 150 years ago) as lighting on the rough-hewn tables.
The waitresses all wear suspenders, too, and cute little tooled-leather Western purses (maybe for cash and what-not?)



Our waitress was gorgeous and funny, and we kept teasing her by asking for "more ketchup and more vodka, please"...they don't serve it (although they have burgers and fries on the menu, this rule is straight out of the hipster handbook, which we are, thanks to my tireless research, familiar with). They won't serve vodka since it wasn't available during Prohibition. Or coffee, but this is one they're working on. Maybe they'll really get into the spirit of things and make cowboy coffee over an open fire...

We bonded with the couple next to us after, over the course of their meal, they attempted to order all three of these items and were sweetly denied by the waitress. I finally couldn't suppress my laughter, and we ended up in a conversation that lasted through dinner and kept us there ordering more rounds of drinks so that we could keep talking.

By the time we were leaving, it had most definitely become a "scene". But in our little dark corner of the Old West we parted as with old friends, full of good honest food and warming ale. And pickles...I'll be back.

What we ordered:

Devils on Horseback (which included requisite dates but also asparagus and blue cheese apples!)

Brisket Sandwich with onion jam (OMG)

"Fried" Chicken (don't expect nasty grease puddles-this was likely brined and lightly oven fried and fabulous)

Delirium Tremens (besides loving the name, it was a gorgeous, smooth carmelly ale)

Allagash Curieux (a slightly more bitter drink for the huz)

Book Haus

Has anyone else read this? I can't put it down. It's an intriguing memoir on its own, but the fact that it's told through a foodie perspective makes it endlessly appealing. It's M.F.K. Fisher meets Like Water for Chocolate. Minus the weirdness.

I will eat it here or there, I will eat it everywhere

Tart Cherry Crumb Cake, recipe and photo via here

Ack, this is officially a "lifestyle blog". I hope you'll forgive me.